Face Fears Now vs. Regret Later

By Mark Schwab, Opportunities to Succeed

What actions / behaviors must you take daily to give yourself the best opportunity to develop and achieve? Everyone wants to experience the achieving part but the daily disciplines is where most remain idle, refrain and wait, wait, wait. Maybe they’re waiting for a better time or when they really feel like it. Essentially, most want to portray being a knight but they don’t want to bleed like one. You have to bleed.

The person I could have been . . .

Lessons of AGE

Not surprisingly, thousands of elderly interviewed, said their biggest disappointment, grief and sadness, was on what they DIDN’T do. You may think this doesn’t apply to you but think again; it’s happening right now a little at a time and for being elderly, you better pray you live long enough to be ELDERLY because that’s happening a little at a time too. We’ve all waited, avoided, delayed on our dreams, goals and desire. We just didn’t have the horse-power and gumption to follow it through at the time. The years pass and so does the season of many important ambitions, intentions, purpose and opportunities to pursue. Furthermore, it’s the guilt, sorrow and yearning for what was left undone, avoided and never pursued which stings most. Regret is heavy, expensive and can linger a life-time.

One man in his late eighties was asked: If you could come back and live the life of anyone, who would you want to come back as? His answer. . .

“I would want to come back as the man I could have been, but never was.” He went on to say, “This time I’d act with more courage. I would face my fears and wouldn’t allow my fear to turn me away from opportunities I didn’t take. I’d risk more; I’d take the chances I wish I had. I’d allow myself to fail more, love more, and laugh more. This time I’d be sure to live more.”

The time will never be just right. The season for opportunity passes quickly. If you’re reading this, there’s still time. Remember, most of our fears are threats to our EGO and not our survival. They’re not physical threats but imaginary ones that keep us stalled, safe but hindered. Fear and danger is very different. Playing it safe, making excuses and waiting, is not effective. Safety goes against every great dream.

Humans have such avoidance, resistance, distress and timid of loss. We fear failing. We fear not being good enough, which is why we’re more motivated to prevent a loss vs. secure a gain or even the attempt of reward and profit.

The only way through fear is to face, risk, brave, confront and meet your aversion eyeball to eyeball.

Take this to heart: For anyone with a dream – Make the attempt, make mistakes, make adjustments, make more mistakes and more mistakes and adjust and adjust.

When we’re young, we don’t feel the value of our time because we likely haven’t suffered great loss but you don’t need to lose the opportunity right in-front of you. In the law of nature, we either grow or die. The same goes for being human, either face fears, grow, develop, progress and mature or we’re dying the death of wither, regress, decline, safe-keeping, protecting and on the defense against life, possibility, freedom, a new beginning, potential and promise.

In closing, you don’t get better because a year passes. Most problems in life and certainly performance problems in athletics don’t fix themselves. If you’re not moving forward and addressing specific wobbly wheels, they will grow stronger and rear their heads at the most crucial times. The mind always adheres to the known. We’re conditioned for primary reality within and secondary reality without. We’d actually be much better off being built from within. In fact, BUILD IT FROM WITHIN from here moving forward and that’s another article as well.

Anything worthwhile is built, reinforced and strengthened over time. Somethings can only increase, rise and deepen over carefully planned stick-to-itiveness. You have to be willing to get uncomfortable while emphasis and efforts on the process vs. the outcome. Get lost in the task at hand, the unfolding and enjoy your movement.

Performance psych / mental-climate is NOT something only to be used when mental / emotional problems are severe. Gaining awareness and addressing within, is about excellence and not a patch job on mental / emotional defects. We all ebb and flow mentally and emotionally and we’re all incomplete at times. EVERY and ANYONE would benefit from going within regardless of their level of ability, competition and success. Most cannot get everything necessary from afternoon practice. In fact, HS / college athletes should be training in the a.m. as well but that’s another article. I can’t imagine being a serious competitor and not training twice a day.

Look, even the slightest adjustment, change or gain, can make all the difference. Leave nothing to chance, take nothing for granted, expect and assume nothing. No one is as good as they can be, everyone has lots of levels to go and the individual who tends, strengthens, reinforces, adjusts and the spirit, thread and core of his / her mental and emotional condition, will have at least giving themselves the best opportunity to succeed.

Mark Schwab – opportunitiestosucceed.com

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